Lost Without You: Loving and Losing Tanya by Vinnie Jones

Book Description:

‘This is a wonderful book. Incredibly moving, sad, inspiring and courageous.’ PIERS MORGAN

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‘This is not a love story I ever wanted to tell, because I hoped it would just go on and on, and never end. I thought that we’d grow old together. I never wanted it to be a tale.

But here I am, a middle-aged man sitting at the kitchen table as the California light fades, thinking about the coming night and how to get through it. Trying to explain to someone – to anyone – what it was like to live through something extraordinary: an amazing three decades that happened to me. Three decades that are now over.’

In July 2019 Vinnie Jones tragically lost his wife and soulmate Tanya after her six-year battle with cancer. Tanya and Vinnie had shared 27 amazing years and raised a beautiful family together. Her passing was a devastating shock to everyone – and Vinnie found himself struggling to cope.

In this extraordinarily intimate memoir, Vinnie tackles his grief honestly and with heart, sharing warm and colourful stories from the 25 years he spent married to Tanya, and unfiltered accounts of the reality of grief. From the darkest hours to the happiest moments, and everything in between, it is tender and heart-breaking, deeply honest but also full of humour and hope.

Written to honour Tanya’s life, Lost Without You is a beautiful and brave story of love and loss. Nothing will take away the pain of Tanya’s death, but if in sharing his experiences Vinnie can inspire others in the depths of the unspeakable to find the help they need, then he will have succeeded in the keeping her kind, caring and selfless spirit alive.

My Thoughts:

I have to be honest and say I know very little about Vinnie Jones’ personal life. I know he was a footballer as well as an actor but that is about it. I had no clue who he was married to, how many children etc. This was a great insight into his personal life as well as seeing a different side to the hardman that is portrayed to us by the media.

The one thing I did notice in the book is that there is very little about the couples son, Aaron. Kaley, Tanya’s daughter, was from her relationship with Steve Terry and there is no denying the bond between not just mother and daughter but Vinnie and Kaley also. At the end of the book it states that Kaley helped Vinnie in writing it. Not sure if this is why or if Aaron preferred for not much to be said regarding him. It did make me feel a little sad that more wasn’t mentioned about the mother and son relationship as I’m sure that the bond was just as strong but it was quite noticeable that their relationship was never mentioned not even his birth.

Like I say I knew nothing about Tanya before reading this book. Having now read it, I have learned what a courageous woman she was. Having battled health issues since her heart transplant when she was 21, it never seemed to get in her way of living her life. Being married to someone famous obviously didn’t change her either and you feel what a genuine and kind person that she was.

This felt like such a personal and heartfelt story. Vinnie himself admits that he wasn’t an angel. He relied heavily on drink which made him aggressive and saw him getting into trouble with the law more than a few times after getting into fights. You can see though that Tanya and Vinnie were made for each other. They loved each other unconditionally and my heart breaks for Vinnie and the rest of Tanya’s family for losing this kind soul far to early in life. It was a great eye opener to what a lovely man Vinnie is and more than anything what a wonderful love story they had. He also opens up in how he deals with the loss and to a certain extent, offering light and hope to others who have lost a loved one also.